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USC or Texas: The Lesser of Two Evils?
Bob Stoops gets soaked at Holiday Bowl. Photo by LaizurePhoto
This is the toughest decision of the year
I'm as big a college football fan as anyone, whether the Sooners are playing or not, and given my travel schedule during the regular season, I don't get nearly the chance that most people do to watch college football on TV.
The bowl season is my last and best chance all year to just sit on the couch and watch some college football. As such, I wouldn't miss the national championship game for the world, whether in person or on TV.
But, all of that said, I find myself, along with most Sooner fans, on the horns (pun intended) of a dilemma as I contemplate the Rose Bowl a few hours hence. For whom to root? It's like being forced to choose between Saddam and Osama - the lesser of two evils.
Or the evil of two lessers, I suppose. Whatever, this is a nightmare matchup.
My first thought was to root for an earthquake, but that's a bit extreme, and after all, it is just a game.
So, to the analysis. USC, with a win, has three national titles in a row, at least according to the AP. The Sooners are one of only a few teams to even have two in a row. Nobody's ever won three, and I sure don't want the only ones to have done it to be USC. The thought of seeing Pete Carroll's smarmy mug hoisting the crystal football makes me ill. Strike one against the Trojans.
On the other hand, the thought of seeing Mack Brown hoisting the crystal makes me ill, as well. Strike one against the Horns.
Plus, given how insufferable Texas fans are when we smack them around five straight times, I can only imagine how puffed their heads will be if they actually win a national title for the first time since they had a former Sooner All-American as their coach. It will be utterly intolerable. Strike two against the Horns.
Then there's the whole matter of the Streak. You know, the Streak. The Undefeated. OU's 47-game string in the 1950's has been kind of like Joe DiMaggio's 56-game hit streak in baseball - the one record that everyone thinks will never be broken. In the almost 50 years since OU's streak ended, no Division I team has ever even entered a season with a chance to tie or break the record.
As proud as we are of our seven national titles and all the other glories of the OU program, I think that winning streak is the most cherished Sooner record of all.
Well, don't look now, but if USC wins tonight, that will make 35 in a row, and another undefeated regular season in 2006, while admittedly unlikely given the talent the Trojans are losing, would make 47. As hard as it would be to lose that singular record, it would be doubly hard to lose it to the likes of Pete Carroll and his bunch. Strikes two and three against USC. They're out.
That leaves me with only Texas.
Texas. Burnt orange and fringe. Hook 'em. Giant rolling bass drums and 15,000 marching band geeks on the field at once. Bubba Jacques. Peter freakin' Gardere. Darrell Royal and spies in the stands. 37,000 people chanting "OU SUCKS."
Sorry. I can't do it. Despite all that is evil and wrong about USC, Texas is that much more evil and wrong. Strike three against the Horns.
On second thought, maybe I will root for that earthquake.